..

and here i am thinking that i cannot even express my thoughts properly.. :))

aurora

wish i saw the aurora borealis. ha ha.. right. keep dreaming about that one..

snowing

i kindda missed the first AND the second snow..  feel like a dum-dum.. :)) if i didn't see it that means it didn't snow :P

today

i don't like myself. feel like i am in a very weird situation. i want something but i get something else from wanting something else in a previous stage and i don't want it anymore. and i am tired of myself and i hate too many discussions and i simply want something else. => if it didn't make any sense for you then you know why i do not like myself. for me it makes sense but i do not like the situation now. *sigh* am so stupid at times..

..

when friendship looks like a leaf in the wind, all you can do is hope that someday the wind will stop.

weird:

1.  it smells of burnt wood on the corridor..

2. the chinese people that live in my building literally run when people get in the building in the same time with them just so they do not greet. what the f***??

off

i've just seen my hands on the keyboard in the screen's light. they say that you know a woman's true age by her hands. mine are getting wrinkled :((

smells dangerously

of winter..

ah and those christmas thingies from the shop were sooooooooooo shiny and good looking!!!! *sigh* am helpless...

..

why can't i sleep? *sigh*

why am i like this?

i don't understand. why didn't i get 3 round stones? why didn't i get the blue scarf? and why the heck i still consider them being whims and still wish for them? :(

hate myself when i am so wish-washy :((

..

am a genius.. :P (the first tangible business model.. done in 10mins :P)

nothing compares with the smell of toast..

May God bless the dude that made toast today. it smelled amazingly well on the corridor.. i wanted to stay out of my room just for the smell of freshly made toast.. :)

and

the loneliness strikes again.

the hardest thing is

knowing you don't make a difference and that you are not needed.

*sigh*

wish i was better

..

i've never seen such beautiful hands before.

danish professors

are naspa.

tired

the company visit from today was a total waste of time. damn it. i could have slept more.

:(

chinese guy next to me (as in my neighbour) is listening to very very sad songs... it makes me want to cry :(

note to self

don't ever do laundry on friday evening...

danish autumn

sucks. smells like romanian spring, but it sucks big time.

..

window shopping is nice.. is nicer when you get to touch the material though..

:))

Emo Philips - "I asked my girlfriend what I should get her for her birthday. 'Oh, I don't know, how about something crazy and expensive that I probably don't need'. So I booked her in for radiation therapy..."  - it just got to me :P




made sarmale today. and chiftele. cool :D

dream

wish i had a car...

a revelation

i just realized that coming here will always be in my past.. duh.. for some it might seem very normal, but only today i realized it..

the janitor

i never saw a clumsier handyman.. he dropped his key into the sink filled with soapy water mixed with toothpaste... remember.. the clogged sink.....

anyway he fixed the faucet and unclogged the sink, which is absolutely great!! and he gave me a dustbin. :D

i think the flea fled because of the stinky chinese cream i bought.. ah well. i won't miss it. :D

i love STM

that's strategic innovation management. the professor is so cool and lovely. he has become one of my favourite professors ever!!



this is the first monday that felt like a friday. and all because today's class was amazing!! :)

couldn't sleep tonight

so i watched toy story 3. i am so pathetic. i cried at toy story 3..

pathetic

i think i would seem pathetic for the others if they were to find out that i am listening to carols in this period of the year..

i am tired.

danish cows..

give danish milk, which is not that tasty. the grass seems greener on the german side. because their cows give rather yummy milk..
nothing compares to the romanian country side milk though..

kinder egg day

monday is kinder egg day. i get a set of 3 from the shrek collection. only once i got another from collection. and guess what.. all the other times i got from the shrek collection i actually got different shrek characters :) :D me happy :)

off track

the wind's so strong here that it can easily push me off track when riding the bike.. :(  it's a nightmare to ride uphill and against the wind or with the wind blowing from one side.. :(

second day of school

terrifying.. :))


the professor has the most beautiful hands i have ever seen.. a very CP-like cynical humour and the mind of a true engineer..

first day of school

first day of school - a total wreck. we didn't do anything. both classes were cancelled. woke up early for nothing..

..

got the blower, 2 brush pens and a new lens today. i was amazed when the delivery guy knocked on my door asked "alice?" "yes". dropped the package in my hand and then he said "bye". he didn't even ask for id or anything. oh well..

you know how there are people who can talk about anything? and seem to know something about anything?.. wish i didn't talk so much about photography. people are not interested in it anyway and i end up talking alone.

..

went to odense yesterday with other international students. saw the princess from far far away. saw a more interesting nikon system.. ate some not tasty food. took lousy pics. went back and tried not to fall asleep on the bus..
all in all.. the campus and the buildings were very disappointing. rusty, not painted. looked ugly. from the airplane i think they would look as if they are made from bricks, but from up close, they looked ugly. :(

..

life seems to be a continuous struggle to gather my hair off the floor and sink.

..

i admit myself incompetent. i cannot play with a yo-yo.. and it sucks.

..

hiked on the bike all alone in the forest near sonderborg. awesome light and shadows and clean paths. gave me the feeling of safety... :)
it was pleasant. too bad CP was not here with me.. :((

..

2 days of orientation and 9 romanian acquaintances later, sonderborg looks awesome. :) even if i don't get to hang out with them a lot.. still.. it's better to know there are people you can go out with and there are people who speak your language... :)

will try my best..

can't wait to see the princess. :D

wanted to go out. woke up with a BIG SUN in my eyes. that was 2hours ago. now is raining. :( oh well.. i hope it won't rain all day, and i can go see the sunset!! :)

..

i can't really get used with the smell of old men and perspiration from the corridor.. :( it stinks.. :((

everybody here runs.. like forest gump, with no real reason whatsoever..be it cloudy, windy, cold, rainy, sunny, you name it. people run.. weird.. :))

..

this island looks like a T-Rex with small tail and a foot in a cast..

..

it finally smells of something. of cold and late autumn..

..

the sinks have been clean for quite some while.

today the air smelled of cows.. weird country. 10mins away from the shore by foot, 5 by bike and it smells of cows and not of sea. and it's not a lagoon!!!

..

very windy day.

after doing groceries, i went and sit on my favourite rocks at the shore. and i picked up a ladybird and she stood on my hand for the longest time, then on my jacket.. i found another one, put them together in the palm, closed the fist and then.. took a peek. the first one flew upset on me, the second stood on my hand for a while, then she went down my trousers back in the grass.. it was really nice. :)

there were 2 chinese girls, with a big camera, taking pics of each other. i already had scenarios in my mind going to them and asking if i could take a picture of them (of course, all this time i didn't have the camera with me.. ). i didn't go.

the whole wheat organic spaghetti suck big time. taste like old flour with water.. still have more than half of package to go.. so.. after i finish it, i am so not going to buy that thing again!!

the asian store i went to is asian alright. arabian to be precise.. i slightly got lost, but i found it in the end. i saw.. arabian maggi. looked... weird. all the products inside looks funky.. the sort of products i will not buy to eat..

got waffles and muffins again. and fruit. i've been missing the fruit. didn't buy meat this time. because i only saw fresh and that meant i have to cook today... afterall.. i took the easy way out. made spaghetti.. oh.. on the spaghetti package it was written in romanian too. :) felt better to be able to read in my language on something. :)

..

the Liu next door is a giggling "she"..

bad dream

while i sat in bed this morning, listening to the mourning trees outside bending under the heavy rain and awful wind, i remembered the dream i had last night. up until now i didn't know when i fell asleep and whether i dreamt or not.. but today, while reading the last pages from "operating instructions" i remembered. there were still fragments i cannot write here because for the reader will make no sense whatsoever.. but there was this awful feeling.. it happened that i had a baby with a stutter and drunkard doctor. much older than me. and she had a rather big head. even if i knew that she was recently born, she could hold her head and she could sit. she would have this kind of ugly shape of her head.. like a mountain crest from left to right.. i dunno where i was but.. when i got there by her side there was WWB and she said that the girls name is Elena Mari....-something (cannot remember). and i didn't even know the surname. and i frantically looked through a pile of files and i found the folder that contained her birth certificate and was overwhelmed with rage when i saw that it is true.. i started yelling that i wanted my girl's name to be Larisa or Eliza (names which i simply adore..). and i remember saying that the next one will be named one of those names. and i know that i was waiting for her to come from the hospital. as if someone else would have given birth to her..

*sigh* i hope nothing from the dream will come true. i hope.. that my babies will be pretty.. and *i* and *my husband* will name them.. this nightmare made me really sad. i wish i hadn't remembered it at all ..


still raining outside. back in brasov this would look like an awful storm. here seems to be... normal. i would go out, but the small pauses between the showers will allow me only to get to spar. which is less than 5 mins away.. will run out of bread today.. so tomorrow i'll have to go for groceries. i am rather terrified to do so.. the rain coat seems a bit.. useless in this wind and rain.. *sigh*

:D

"oh blimey!" only if i think about "you big spanish onion" and "you macaroni face" it brings a smile on my face.. :P

hate rainy days..

stayed indoors yesterday too because of the rain.. today is rainy again. annoying. because i had nothing sweet and nice to eat, my sugar level was going low. and because i had to go outside at least a wee bit, i put on city clothes and went for the spar store near the dorms. the moment i got out of the dorm i asked myself why did i even bother to leave.. rainy and windy don't make good pair.. ("mind you language" came to mind when i wrote the previous sentence.. :)) ).
i started sneezing today.. *sigh* hope it will not be the start of a cold though..

so.. as i was saying. went to get some goodies. got a small box of kinder eggs. i wondered whether there are 2 inside. there were 3.... and what toys.. they seem to make more difficult to assemble toys in denmark than in romania. i felt a bit stupid.

i got the ogre (i wanted to get donkey though..), the chalet with the kids on a sledge (that one made me feel "stupider" than a 5 year old.. ) and the spinner. :( but the sugar rush was good for me. i also got 2 giant rolls. so i only ate one egg, which by the way was how it used to be in romania when i was a kid.. :P

i hope the sneezes and the funky feeling from this morning were nothing.. am trying to keep warm, but somehow, even with the blankets on i get the feeling that is cold in the room...


i miss tea ceremony, and calligraphy and writing kanji.. i feel... sad about it. very.. pointless.. like i have lost the only things that i took initiative to do in my whole life.. there's only one asian shop in town, and i bet from the outside looks of it that is not selling anything else but food. *sigh*

later edit: the corridor smells of old men sweat and old things and CP's old kitchen table.. 

:(

it rains again... :((

cleaned & unpacked

i finally unpacked all my things, and put them into drawers and on shelves. still if i have the feeling that they are not in order.. i dunno why.. :)) maybe because i dragged it so long..

i swept away lots of hairs.. :( i hope i am not going bald.. :(

tonight i cannot make my regular pot of tea. the pot is filled with peas. a peas that is a wee bit too sweet for my liking.. oh well..

i have 101dkk in coins. i have coins from 1989, 1995, 1993, 2001, 2003, 2009. i was shocked to see a coin from 1989. a coin of 50 øre. the only difference between it and a 2000 coin of 50 øre was a small heart.. one didn't have it... that was.. impressive.. i mean.. i am 23y.o. and i have already seen  denominations and/or changes of money.. it seems that they like to be rather.. stable..

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Danish_krone

..

today someone got into my room. opened a bit the door said "ups" and left and locked the door again. i was lying there in bed on my tummy absolutely shocked. couldn't say or do anything. then later when i talked with CP he said i should approach the office and ask if it was someone from them. so.. after struggles to get through and after shaking like hell, i called the janitor and asked him. he said that it is true, he got inside. he has mistaken the room, he wanted to go to 108 (i'm at 107). he said i should rest assure that nothing's gonna happen. so.. i calmed down..

later, i went and cook. peas and fries. :P and there was this asian guy that came in the kitchen. we greeted, he put some kind of small bakery stuff in the oven and left. when he came back, he took them out and sat at the table eating. i went to rinse the cloth with which i was going to clean the hot plates and the table where i cooked. and i wished him "good eating". he said he didn't understand. i explained that this is some greeting you say to a person that is going to eat; basically you wish him/her to have a pleasant meal. he said he's just eating, he doesn't have a meal. *sigh* i said it's ok and got back from the sink to my pot and pan. he after that took his plates and left. now i wished i didn't say anything more than "hello". *sigh* if i hadn't said it though, i would have always asked myself if i had said something, how the conversation would have continued. damn.
i just shouldn't have said anything. now i feel like a silly person, trying too hard to socialize with others..

i hope tomorrow is going to be a good weather. sky looks a bit blue now, after a whole day or shower-like rain..

:((

awful storm outside.. with lots of thunders and big huge lightnings :(( i don't like it.. i am scared.. :((

didn't see that one comin'

she called. she wants to meet up and go to the mill.. yay..

hm..

4th day of having a bike.. of riding one.. and i feel my feet rather powerless.. well.. exercise never killed no one.. :D :P

rainy day again.. will stay indoors and do some chores, like unpacking.. or will sleep things off a bit :D

..

i have more gray hairs now than before.. *sigh*

..

i hate my obsessions..

i should..

go out. explore the city..
i texted J to ask her if she wants to go for a ride to the mill on the hill which i have no idea how to get to in the first place.. i feel.. alone.

and i've lost that damned brush-pen :((

*sigh* again

because i felt guilty, even if the weather was chilly i went for 30mins of ride. came back and made some fries.. hate this pan. is the kind of sticky pan. so.. the thought "damn, i peeled too many" transformed slowly in "damn, i peeled too few"..
i ate the "big" plate of fries in 5mins...

made tea again. i literally drink pots of tea. this is the second 2L pot for today. was thinking.. is it bad for my organism if it's green tea with mint flavour?.. you barely feel the green tea...

..

i miss my shodo kit..

uff

rainy day.. won't go anywhere today.. planning on making fries later this afternoon.
i feel soooooooo sleepy..

isn't she pretty?

so.. i couldn't stay too long inside when i had her in the shed.. so i thought.. what the heck, let's just ride a bit :)

so. the bike seller agreed with me that this country has no smell. it should smell of the sea for cryin' out loud, i'm on an island afterall.. but nope.. the wind smells of nothing. absolutely nothing. the people, the shops, the streets.. have no smell.. on the other hand.. the dorms building smells of old people.. :-|

anyway.. i rode and it was nice.. i should get the headset in my ears though because the wind is too much for me... :)
all in all.. it was a really nice day.

and oh.. the food i cooked for myself (actually the first time i cooked and i had to eat what i cooked) was really good :D will cook again tomorrow :)

she's so pretty.. oh so pretty...

and so.. pinkish and with a basket in front *giggles*

am talking about the bike. i just purchased a second hand bike that is rather.. new :) and it's beautiful.. and pink and it feels nice.. i really like it :)
i admit i dunno what i'll do with it later on.. whether i'll sell it, store it at CP's (i can even hear him yell in desperation "NO!!"), keep it for myself.. but for now.. i am just happy.

my watch stopped at 5:58:46 in the morning i came here, august 5th 2010.today we went and i got a new battery for it.. and my time has started again.. :)

 the bike seller (i.e. Jessica) took me for a ride and showed me a bit around and talked to me and.. guess what she still wants to talk to me and show me around tomorrow too!!, life looks much.. pink-er than before.. it definitely feels better :)

Thank you. everyone. especially CP.

dirty again

one sink was dirty again. as if someone washed their dog in it from the mud and falling hair.. *sigh*

it's so easy to feel depressed on a rainy day... wish the weather will come around soon...

dirty again

one sink was dirty again. as if someone washed their dog in it from the mud and falling hair.. *sigh*

it's so easy to feel depressed on a rainy day... wish the weather will come around soon...

*rather pissed*

When you volunteer to be the guide for a new student, you should take responsibility for him/her. Give him/her the directions he/she needs without trying to avoid talking to that student. It's rather nașpa trying to avoid that student. You lose credibility and respect all at once. Yet again, volunteering for this kind of jobs just to look good in the eyes of the other students or professors just makes you an ass.

out again..

as the depression slowly goes away and i feel the urge to do things, see things.. :) now i feel that i don't have time :))

tomorrow i'll get to see the bike and see if it's ok.. :) yay

today, while i was walking, there was this song on the mp3-player: "outside" by staind featuring fred durst. the live version, where the guitar is simply amazing. it reminded me of him when he played for me. i can't remember but the fact he was looking at me and i was looking at his fingers but i didn't see his fingers moving. it was beyond everything i could comprehend. the music was filling me with joy, with hope, with love. he played so gracefully and superb. i am not an expert in it, but it sounded amazing..

i saw this really old couple walking down by the shore holding hands.. let's be like them..

second cooked meal..

was yesterday. :)
came back from the harbour. went out and got some nice pics of it (will upload them on flickr soon) and then took a long walk to the supermarket. spent not so much as the last time and was happy about it and well.. i got back to the dorm. was really tired and really wished i could just.. sleep a bit. i actually laid on the bed, eyes closed and i remember telling myself "don't you dare sleep. the chicken legs will go bye bye if you do". i put them in the bag, along with the other things i needed for cooking so.. i had to drag myself out from my sleep and just to take the bags and head to the kitchen.
i have to say this: the sinks were awfully dirty and clogged. when i was at the store i bought a set of 6 cloths for universal use. when i bought them i already decided i should sacrifice one of them. when i saw the sinks i was "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!! There's no was i would touch that sink!!"..
so i began cooking. after the chicken stew started boiling and i finished peeling the potatoes, i headed to wash the potatoes. guess what.. while washing 6 potatoes, the sink was already half full with water. :( i put the potatoes to boil (the second dish was potato stew) and the sink had not emptied with water. got pissed. :)) (i just remembered that once, when i chatted a special someone, instead of writing "i am pissed", i wrote "i pissed" :)) ) and put some detergent of the voluntarily sacrificing cloth and washed the sinks and the tables next to them. just when i was thinking "they better keep it clean and they should thank me!!" (right.. as if someone was gonna make me a statue because i cleaned 2 sinks, a table and 4 boards near the hot plates and the sinks..) and stretching forward to clean a corner of a board, i hit my head in the closet above the sink.. i got even more pissed.. oh well..  that should teach me ;))

after i took the garbage and everything i owned and took out the garbage, i went back trying to lie to myself that i'm checking for "forgotten things".. but i was actually went there like a criminal that wants to see the crime scene again.. like an inspector to see if things were still cleaned.. :)) i actually wrote a note on a small sheet of paper "Let's try to cook in a cleaner place :)" - but i didn't place it there in the kitchen.. not yet.. ;)) :P

anyway, the food was good... so.. yay.. :D
at least i was happy about myself that i cleaned the place well after i left.. tonight am craving to get some mint tea so.. i will head there fearfully to see whether is still cleaned or not.

getting lost again..

this time even while following the map..:))
wanted to get to the harbour on the fast way.. and i took the wrong way.. but.. i turned around and even if it started raining i decided to go ahead and see how close is the harbour from the junction where i took the wrong turn.
it was close.. but the lazy rain (it felt like the drops were falling as if someone pushed the pause-start-pause buttons..) turned into a heavier one, even if still lazy. i think that because it rains so often here, when it falls, it falls in a lazy way.. :))
see?..

so.. important thing: raincoat keeps rain away for half of the sleeves and less than a third from the pants. in this rain shoes get wet pretty fast.. so are the pants.. i got back with them heavy with water and from the jacket i could literally squeeze water out.. :(
of well.. let's see how it goes..

first cooked meal..

was sunny side up eggs that ended up scrambled eggs and normal instant soup that ended up being spicy soup.. :))
well.. at least i didn't set up any fire alarms so.. :D it's oki.. :))

note to self: try not taking your glasses next time you go cooking.. it's nice to see things around and not get steam on the glasses :P

*tired*

if you're gonna wake me up with very loud music in the morning, at least play some damn good music not club music...
and oh.. stop slamming those doors!!

*sigh*

wish i was happier and took one big bite of life here. i feel.. tired of it..

*giggles*

right.. so.. my first attempt to make friends was.. a success.. more or less. i wonder if she thinks i'm some kind of a weirdo.. :))
i mean how often is it that a person comes to you says "hi, i'm new here i'm trying to make friends. would you like to go for a walk these days if you're not busy?"..
but i only went to ask because of 2 persons. so.. i might need to be prepared to take some more risks.. but while taking risks can give you good situations and bad ones, sometimes i just like to... don't take risks that easily.. uf.. i should bite more from this life as someone said. a good big bite.. let's see how it goes..

Hm..

so.. as my dwarves were fighting hard on whether to create a blog or not.. i ended up with creating a gmail address and a blog, for my need to write down my thoughts is beyond imaginable.. damn..

so.. this is the third day in denmark.. is not.. exactly what i would have imagined. as in.. i think of it being very strongly danish-like and yet without a substance whatsoever.. 
being on an island you'd think that it would smell of water, right? well.. it doesn't.. i sniffed around alot.. that was disappointing.. and oh.. i just realized why it looks so empty all around. there are few people (they seem to like the interior of their homes instead of the fresh air) and no stray dogs at all.. i kindda.. miss them :))