Have you ever noticed when the people around you (shop assistants or waiters) are upset or tired about something? Have you ever just gone to them and told them a sincere "Thank you!"?
I noticed that people do not seem to care about anyone around them. How many times have we said "I don't care, he/she should have just done his job correctly!" not caring if he/she had a problem or someone said something mean during a vulnerability moment. I... did that. I cannot pretend that now I am the most observant person in the world, but when I do see the worry or sadness or just a bad mood, I just remind them that their work is valued. Is not so hard, just a smile and a "Thank you" is enough to make someone feel better and appreciated.
Been with the girls in a club recently, to celebrate a bachelorette. There was a girl that had to clean the table. She came at our table and was very upset or (I assume) in a bad mood from some personal reasons. All around, people had come to have fun, to drink, dance and do stupid things. She was working there. In that mess. And she was not feeling that good. Maybe I am wrong. She came around 3-4 times to change the ash trays and to take the bottles or cans. One time, I just slightly touched her hand and yelled in her ear (otherwise, she wouldn't have heard because of the music): "Thank you very much!". She did not reply but she showed me a lovely smile. Too bad it was a tired smile. So... she was tired and she felt she was dealing with a mess. Which was not far from the truth.
Earlier than evening, we were at a pizza place. My sister's pizza got mixed up with someone else's, who already started eating it. My sister was very pissed at the waitress because of that. She felt embarrassed by that girl's mistake. We (a friend of ours and I) tried to calm her down, but my sister was too stubborn. There could have been a lot of reasons for the misunderstanding (we were 15 persons at the table, each with something different and there were ladies who did not even recall what was their bloody order), but my sister tried by all means to speak in an ugly manner to the waitress and to make her feel as bad as she did. Was it worth it? The fact that my sister got upset and that she wanted to make the waitress "pay" for her mistake?
Two days later, I had to go to the wedding. We had a very very very good music. Well, at least, I personally enjoyed it tremendously. The D.J. even played "Next door to Alice" :-). At the end, on our way out, we were passing by the D.J.. So, I just yelled to him (again, the speakers were loud and otherwise he wouldn't have heard me): "Thank you for a superb music!". He smiled slightly embarrassed and mumbled something which I did not hear. I assume her felt better when hearing that his work actually impressed someone. Is important, isn't it? It makes people feel better and is not taking a lot of effort.
I was in Denmark, at a shop buying some food, and at the counter, the shop assistant was obvious dead tired. I thought she was not feeling well, so after I took my groceries I asked her if she is OK. She said she was just very tired and that she will be alright. So I left. I just wished I knew how to make her feel a bit better.
Is not hard to just make someone feel good about their work, is it? Why people cannot forget for some time to be selfish and egocentric? Why can't we see the others because of our selfishness? Because "It's their duty and they should not make mistakes!!" applies to us as well, right? But we quickly try to give some excuses to our mistakes or simply we just say "I don't care!".
Why is it so easy to blame others for the things we find it so hard to blame ourselves?
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